Scars
by NewToYourWorld
Summary: Nico hasn't been well. He has nightmares and suicidal thoughts, but he has no one to turn to. Poor Nico just can't see himself happy anymore. Taking responsibility, Percy Jackson 'kidnaps' Nico di Angelo in effort to make him see a better day. A beach trip full of drama, awkward teenage crushes and emotional turmoil, the two start to question some parts of themselves.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys! This is a new story. I know there are a million and two Pericos but I am joining this bandwagon (even though I am more Jasico). This chapter is kinda short but it's a kick off to something even bigger and better and sweeter and melodramatic so stick around and read the rest. Also, check out my other stories :) okay, thanks. Be good, be safe. **

The hard laugh of the familiar King Minos only made the grip he had on me worse. His fingers were tangled in my hair and he pulled with such a power. I bite my lips until they bleed to keep from crying out loud because I couldn't dare to show any weakness. I spent months with King Minos and I knew what he could do to me.

"Does it hurt?" His grip got harder and harder, "Do you want to cry out boy? Answer me!" I didn't open my mouth. I couldn't let him win.

The dead King started to walk, dragging me behind him by my hair. I tried to stand and walk besides him, I tried to keep up. His stride was long and fast and I ended up being pulled like meat on the floor where my legs became bloodied. I couldn't fight King Minos and I couldn't scream so I let what happen happen. I knew where he was taking me, I could feel another unholy being pulling on me and it was all too familiar.

Tartarus.

I tried so hard to keep quiet, but the fear was too real. I released my bloody lip, "Let go of me! Let me go, you worthless king!" That was the wrong thing to say.

King Minos lifted me until I was eye level with him, "Worthless king? I died loved and important. I was great and powerful and what are you? A curse. Everything you love dies or hates you." He smiled knowing he won as tears rolled down my face. "This is what you deserve."

With one great thrust, King Minos pushed me back and I started to fall, and fall, and fall.

Then I screamed so loudly that it crossed over from a dream to real life. I was awake. It was only a dream, just a dream. Still the feeling of pain and fear were still with me. Instinctively, I reached under my mattress to get a small knife. Gently and swiftly, I swiped it across my wrist just deep enough to let it bleed.

I swiped once, twice, third and a final fourth. I watched the blood slowly build up and run down my arm. The stinging sensation and the itching feeling from the blood on my skin was sickly satisfying and calmed me.

"What are you doing Nico?" I said out loud, like I would answer myself. After a few minutes, I bandaged my damaged skin where my new cuts and many old scars were. I took a breath and sighed, "I miss you Hazel."

* * *

At camp, after a good work out with dangerous people and weapons in full armor, you tend to sweat. Since Camp Jupiter and Camp Half-Blood were conjoined, I could train with anyone (who doesnt know me). I have no idea who I trained with today, but I won.

Without thinking, I took off my helmet and poured cold water on my already set hair. Someone once told me that when I did this, steam rose up from my hair. A side effect from having my father's somber hair. While cooling myself down, Leo took adventage of my overheated state.

"Hey Nico," he smiled, "long time, no see. Where have you been?"

I looked away, trying not to give Leo eye contact. Usually, people feel too estranged to talk when you can't look at their face, but maybe Leo knew me too well for that to work. "Hey Leo. I have been around," I had to think of something natural, "Haven't you seen me? I have seen you around."

"Nope, but I have been in the forge a lot too." A had a moment of relief. "But I talked to Percy, and he hasn't talked to you since..." Leo hesitated and I looked at him. His face finished his sentence for him, "Well since Annabeth switched to Camp Jupiter."

_Smooth Leo_, I thought,_ you liar._

"Leo, Nico, what's up," a exhausted voice called from behind.

"Hey Percy! Jason said he was gonna iris call, did you catch him?" Leo responded.

Percy laughed, "Nope, been outside all day." His attention was turned to me, a rare sight now and days. "Hey Nico."

I simply muttered hello back. I couldn't talk to Percy, couldn't even look at him. Not since he Hazel's funeral. My mind was a mess and my heart was pounding out of my chest I swear people around me could hear it. I didn't know if it was a side effect of anxiety or just from being near Percy.

"Were you just training? Maybe we can spar together, maybe make some bets?" Percy was really trying with me, but I just couldn't let him in.

"I actually was going to soak in a bath. Talk later guys." I started to walk off before Leo could finish awkwardly saying bye.

The camp bathes were literally a row of tubs with curtains next to the showers. They were hardly used for anyone but son of Ares and Hetpheteus in the boys bathroom, but the girls all shared the baths in the girl washroom.

Washroom, geez I just dated myself. It was noticeable at times that I wasn't from this generation. I am not even young enough to father this generation. Grandfather it might be more accurate. Just one more thing.

Pulling the curtain, I started a warm bath and stripped off my armor and under clothes. I stopped at my bandana which was wrapped over my cuts and scars. I debated whether to take it off and I decided to remove it after a minute.

Shaking from the sweat drying off of me, I stepped into the bath and started to decompress. My muscles started to release, and I closed my eyes. I wish I didn't get in the bath because it relaxed me too much. I started to get into my deeper darker part of my mind. Questioning important things in my life, like it's very meaning. Sadly, I found nothing.

I have had these feelings before and I wish I didn't. I didn't necessarily want to die, but I wanted to be at peace. This time was different some how. More powerful, more real. I looked down in my own bath.

Slowly, I lowered my head under the water. It was warm and calming under water. I stayed there and made sure to be completely still as bubble escaped from my lips and surfaced. Each bubble was a bit of my life. I had an eerie sensation when the last bubble pushed past my upper lip and surfaced.

I have never had a near death experience like this before. Things were a lot different then being chased by a monster and I wasn't sure what to expect. I hear a noise, but shook it off as my imagination.

I shouldn't have.

Something grabbed my chin and pulled me out of the water. I spit water out and wiped it from my eyes before I look to see who it was. Some green doe eyes looked down on me in shock. Percy was holding my helmet in his arm and his lip was quivering a bit.

He unplugged my bath and picked up my towel for me. I didn't want Percy to see me naked. I pleasured myself to the thought of him seeing me naked, but this was not the situation and it only made things intimidating and awkward.

Still shaking from pulling me out of the water, Percy wrapped me in my towel and began to rub it on me to dry me. I didn't move and I didn't know what to say. What do I do now? What does Percy do? I don't think he has ever met someone who was suicidal. Will he go to Chiron?

Percy stopped rubbing my body and grabbed my arm. He must have seen my blemishes, and I tried to pull my wrist away to spare him but Percy was stronger. Cautiously, he ran his finger down over my scars.

Then he looked up to me. His eyes were beginning to get cloudy, "Nico...why haven't you...how..." It was difficult to see Percy lose his composer, "I am sorry Nico."

That did it for me, and I started to cry to. Percy let go of my hand and trotted out of the bathhouse. Cold and crying, I tried to think of what I had done.

I was broken, ever since Bianca died and only got worse since Hazel died. I know I wasn't okay, I wasn't the same person. I accepted that. Percy, however, was the same Percy after all these years, just better.

But I think in that moment, I broke Percy just like how he broke me all those years ago.

And so I wept from my crime.


	2. Chapter 2

_**I am sorry this is taking me so long to update. I am having a lot go on in my life and I feel really bad. I will not leave these stories unfinished though, I promise. Be good, be safe, share my stories. PLEASE SHARE MY STORIES! Love you guys, see you soon.**_

"GOOD MORNING, DI ANGELO," a very loud Percy awakened me with 2 suitcases hitting the floor. "Sorry to wake you, but we have a big day and you have to pack. Pack for 2 weeks at the beach. I'll be back in 3 hours." And as abruptly as he came in my cabin he left while I was still rubbing my eyes.

What was that about?

* * *

Somehow I blindly followed Percy in a car with two suitcases packed for 2 weeks. I didn't bother to ask where we were going or what was happening. I just looked out the window, probably because I couldn't look at Percy. I had so much shame for letting him see me so weak. I sat awkwardly with my hands in my lap and eyes staring into space. Percy could clearly see I was not okay.

"Are you with me, Nico?" Percy reached over and put his hand on my knee and rubbed it. "You are quiet, and your face is really red."

"Yeah, well I am being kidnapped. How am I supposed to feel?" Frantically, I swatted Percy's hand away so I could stop blushing.

"Well don't you want to know where we are going?" Percy smiled.

"I guess. Where are we going?"

"I can't tell," Percy laughed. I decided to stop talking about it and stare out the window some more. Getting carsick was better then trying to figure out Percy Jackson. "There it is! My beach cabin."

I looked over to see an old, almost abandoned cabin that must had been made in the seventies and had hardly anything worth value about it. "This is yours?"

He smiled, "For the next few weeks, yeah. You okay with this?" Percy made these big puppy eyes, the same ones he used to make me pack and I dumbly nodded. "Well, let's go unpack, then we can get the groceries," Percy went on and on about things we could do with a goofy smile that flashed his slightly off front teeth. He was so happy to be here at the beach cabin.

But I had a dilemma, "I am actually kind of tired. Is it okay if you go shopping and I just sleep?"

It was like looking at a puppy who was excited to have a ball thrown and realize that there is no ball at all. "Oh, okay. That's fine I suppose."

When Percy opened the cabin door, and it was worse on the inside then outside; cob webs on the ceiling and under the beds, which looked as comfortable as the floor. It has an abnormal smell like ocean and old fabric, and all the wood looked warped. I gave Percy a 'really' look and he smiled so proudly I melted and faked a smile.

"I love it here," Percy gently put his suitcase by a bed and I went to the one parallel to it. "I'll leave so you can sleep."

"Thanks," I said while climbing in bed.

* * *

Crouching, naked and shaking in a corner, I tried to hide my face from the people. I couldn't see them, but I heard them yelling and insulting me.

"Your spine is sticking out. It's disgusting."

"The hell is the matter with you? All you do is ruin things!"

"Do you think that you are the reason everyone you love dies?"

"What would your mother think if she knew her son was a faggot? How did she raise him?"

"It doesn't even matter what his father think because he doesn't care about him."

I started to get blurry eyed from crying. I tried to open my mouth to make it stop. I tried really hard to just take it, but I hated hearing it. I didn't know what to do.

As the voices continued, I slowly turned my head to see who was there only to see absolutely nothing. No one was there. Then I realized, the voices were my voice. I was saying those things. Then I read "Nico. Nico!" Another strange voice called my name. I closed my eyes and begged it to stop. "Please, Nico. Wake up," and a cold hand on my face startled me. Percy was looming over me, his thumb rubbing my wet cheeks. I quickly slapped his hand away and sat up to hide my face. Percy rubbed my back, making me have tingles where his fingers were, "What did you dream about?"

"Nothing. Nothing at all. Can you just leave me alone?" I muttered. I started to get up and leave, but instead he just leaned in me and wrapped his strong arms around me to get me to stay still.

Percy did what I never seen before, and furrowed his eyebrows. "Don't you fucking dare do that Nico. I neglected you for too long, but don't you shut me out." I didn't move while Percy held me for fear of what might happen afterwards. I could hardly breath in the shock of the moment. Eventually, I came to my senses and shook him off.

"I don't want your help Percy. I don't need you and I don't know why I am here. Just let me know when I am free to go."

I just got up to walk out of the nasty cabin when I heard Percy say, "I am not forcing you here. Leave if you want, but you don't want to. You want help, I know it."

"You don't know anything. You hardly know me!" It was the truth.

"Then stay, and let's get to know each other. Come on Nico, no one should feel that alone." I stopped, and felt a burning sensation in my wrist. I hated him talking about my cuts. "If you leave, you force me to tell the authorities."

"You would tell Chiron on me?"

"I didn't say Chiron," and like that, Percy won. There was no way I saw going to a funny farm, ever. I swallowed my pride, and turned back. "I only want to help you."

"Then shut up," I snapped and flopped on my bed.

Percy watch me from the doorframe, "Do you want me to sleep with you?" I felt a burst of panic and excitement, which got me stuttering, "I can move my bed over to yours, and it might help you sleep tonight if someone is there."

"Oh, sure," I am an idiot. "You don't have to. I don't care at all."

Percy smiled and moved his bed next to mine to sleep next time me. "What do you dream about?"

I shrugged, "Tartars."

"Me too," I didn't know Percy had nightmares too. "I am sorry for holding you down and cursing at you. I was just really frustrated. You are a lot stronger then you look."

"Yeah, people say that. I think I look really strong though, so it confuses me." I sat up on my knees and flexed my arms. Muscles that were hidden popped out of my biceps, triceps and forearm. Percy took it as a challenge and flexes his arm too, but I started to blush a little so I became a smart ass. "I see some flap on you."

He laughed, thankfully, "Are you drunk? Where?"

I lifted my shirt and bit the end, "Here." I showed Percy my hard earned six-pack and smiled.

"I have one too," then Percy lifted his shirt to show his abs to me. "My man-boobs are bigger then yours. I was probably crazier then you too. I once shot a bus with a canon." I called Percy stupid and laughed, something I haven't done in a while. "You have a nice smile Nico."

I awkwardly went back to my natural frown. "I find it hard to take you seriously when we aren't in the heat of battle. That's all."

Percy smiled now, the corners of his lips were held up by his dimples, "Walls are heavy, but its okay to let them down every once and a while."


	3. Chapter 3

**_Hey guys, hope you are all doing okay. Hope you all enjoyed Blood Of Olympus :) I won't ruin any of it in y story, don't worry. I started writing it before the book came out._**

**_Since the days of PJO and HOO have come to and end, I will finish Lover of the Sun and Scars and write ONE MORE PJO STORY. This doesn't mean I am done writing. I am actually getting more serious about my stories. I really want to get started on my novel soon. _**

**_Now here is what I need from you guys. I am writing one last story, any story and you guys can pick the pair and plot. I need to hear everyone's dream story, and I will pick which one to write. The best way to do this though, and have the perfect story, is to get as many ideas as possible, so SEND MY STORIES TO EVERYONE!_**

I was tearing up this shit cabin up looking for my scrapbook knife. I know I packed it, but it wasn't in my suitcase. I started ripping through Percy's bag as fast as I could. I assumed I only had about an hour until Percy returned from the store, and the urge was like a hurricane surrounding me and throwing me around. I need my knife and I was going to cut.

I was tossing Percy's clothes behind me, just making a mess all over. Shirts, shorts, pants, swim trunks, shampoo, and soap. I scattered it all over the place with no bias as to how to throw someone else's belongings because I just didn't care. I was violent in my searching. Until I saw it, my temptation.

A pair of boxer briefs comfortably tucked the edge of Percy's duffle bag. All the voices in my head said, "NO Nico, it's wrong, it's gross, it's rude. Just step away." How can I do that? I know what science and people say about being…gay, but my old 1940's mind said no no no. It's a conflict of generations, and it is literally burning me alive. Well, not literally.

I reached out and grabbed the seemingly perfect underwear. It was soft, and I knew it hadn't been worn since the last wash. I brushed my fingertips through the gentle cotton, and with a lot of guilt, became aroused. I brought the briefs to my face and took pleasure in the fact that Percy's balls were held in there. By the gods was I horny.

I forgot all about the knife, and lay back on the nasty cabin floor and indulged in my own pleasure.

* * *

"Hey, Nico. What are you doing outside? It is sunny and all. What if you tan?" Percy teased with a crazy ton of canned goods and Cheez-its. "Are you okay?"

"You are ruining my mojo Jackson. I am processing a fair amount of energy and into the sand to…go away." I didn't completely know if it was working, but I didn't have to urge to cut or masturbate so I think I was doing it right. "Join me? It might be able to help you forget about a certain blonde person whose name you whisper at night." I cracked an eye open to see Percy, thankfully, that my suggestion lightly. Percy put the bags down, and made himself comfortable by me. He did what I did, and close his eyes, bury his hands in the sand and sit still.

Two ADHD boys, sitting in silence and channeling energy was just impossible. We wiggled and sighed and I am sure Percy's mind wondered just as much as mine. Finally, Percy jumped up and grabbed my hand, "Let's go swimming."

"I have no trunks. I didn't pack any."

"So? We are alone." Then Percy began to strip all the way down to the boxers as if he enjoyed making me uncomfortable. Being alone with Percy was much worse then swimming naked in the germ, shit and fish filled ocean. Besides, what if Poseidon sees something bad?

"I rather not. I…" What was a good answer for not swimming with the son of Poseidon? "I got strung by a jelly fish last time I was in the ocean. I feel better on land." I forced a smile, which now that I think about it, made me look like a lair. "Wanna build a fire instead?"

Percy moaned because he really did want to go swimming, but I was too young to build a beach fire by law. So he sucked it up, and stayed in the sand with me to make a fire and cook some food.

Percy babbled on about all sorts of things. He talked about his mom and Paul and his trouble sleeping. Every now and then he would ask if he was boring or should stop talking. Of course I said he could keeping going and listened intently without a peep. I watched his pink lips and big cheeks, dreaming of letting mine brushing his lips. I wanted to kiss Percy every way possible. I wanted so desperately to lick his lips, nibble on his bottom lip, slip my tongue in his mouth, and make him mine.

Oh shit, I went too far. Naked grandma. Naked grandma. Naked grandma.

"We should invite Jason, or Frank. Leo is busy, of course," I realized Percy was still talking, but his words were becoming slurred. He was so tired, neither of us ever sleep well. "Wouldn't it be nice if someone else was here to help you? We are all your friends Nico, and we want to...help..." and like that, Percy faded into sleep on my shoulder. His breathing became a sweet rhyme as his chest slowly rose and fell. His neck must have been uncomfortable, so I nudged him just enough to move him to a more suitable position.

I didn't know if I wanted anyone else there, and I didn't know how to react to Percy's compassion. It gave me a warm feeling all over, but at the same time, it made all my cuts burn with guilt instead of my normal self hate and angry. I didn't know how to get help, but maybe I was too afraid to get help. I don't know if I can even be saved.

I hope I can be saved.

I hope Percy can save me.

Percy looked so peaceful in his sleep. I hoped he was dreaming about Annabeth so he would have sweet dreams.

I couldn't resist Percy. I leaned into Percy, so close I could fee his sweet breathe on my cheeks. I noticed Percy's eyelashes more then anything. They were so long and thin, and stared at them until I closed my eyes. My lips brushed against Percy's that explored into my body and made my every nerve tingle. Pressing my lips into him harder and harder until I was legitimately kissing Percy Jackson.

It was exciting, and my chest started to swell. I though I would burst from my stitches. It gave me more feeling then anything before. Better then cutting, eating real food, running, or play games.

I pulled away really quickly as to not wake Percy, but I wish I did wake him. Maybe he would wake up, realize he loves me, or is just curious, and kiss me back. But I am dreaming too much. I need to stop dreaming all the time. Its bad for health.

I smiled though. I did the one thing I always wanted to do, and I think my Percy cravings are done now.

Gently, I let my finger tips run on his skin to give him some comfort in hopes that it would make him feel good and sleep well. A part of me wish he had a good dream about Annabeth instead of a nightmare. The other part wished he dreamed of me, nightmare or sweet dream.


End file.
